It is no secret that Mother’s Day can be the most difficult day of the year for a woman. As Elyse Fitzpatric describes it:
“Mother’s Day angst sounds like this: I wish I were a mother. I wish I were a better mother. I wish I loved my mother. I wish my mother loved me. I wish my mom were still alive. I wish I hadn’t aborted that child. I wish I could have children. I wish I knew who my mother was. I wish I hadn’t given my baby away. I wish my children loved me. I wish they would write. I wish they were still alive.”
She goes on to describe the beautiful news that our fundamental identity is not in our performance but in the status of Daughter that Christ purchased for us. Let us delight in our identity as Daughters on Mother’s Day!
But I want to add something else to the conversation. The gospel also frees us to actually honor our mothers on Mother’s Day.
Now the law says, “Honor your father and mother.” And we fall short.
We might list the reasons we are unable to honor our mothers. Or, we load one side of the scale with that time we remembered Mother’s Day, hoping our mothers feel the honor-shame scale has tipped to the honor side.
But dishonoring our mothers has cost a great price, and not just to our relationships. The Father was deaf to his Son’s cry because God meant it when he said, “Honor your mother.” And he noticed when we failed.
So these words come as sweet news:
“In [Jesus] we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of our trespasses, according to the riches of his grace”
Ephesians 1:7
Do you hear that? By the Son’s cry and sigh we are offered forgiveness for every time we didn’t honor our mothers. We stand in the righteousness of Jesus, who honored his sinful mother perfectly. This is precious gospel.
Grace is the very substance of Paul’s letter to the Ephesians. So perhaps it comes as a surprise when we read in his letter the familiar words of the commandment: “Honor your father and mother” (Eph 6:2).
Why here Paul? Isn’t the command to honor your mother in opposition to grace?
But Paul’s message is that it is by grace we can now honor our mothers. How?
Formerly, when we were still in bondage to our deceptive master, Sin, we could not honor our mothers. In place of honor was flattery or manipulation on one hand. Or, on the other hand, withholding any display through unthankfulness or a take-it-for-granted attitude.
But God paid our ransom price. He bought us out of chains and gravel and spit.
And this is the grace for Mother’s Day: We are no longer captive to an old heart that dishonors our parents. We are now free to honor our mothers. Mother’s Day is a glorious day to see and to delight in the power of the gospel. As we truly honor our mothers it is God himself at work in our hearts.
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